Silence

Ok so I've been a bit quiet on the blog-front and I' sorry to say that it's not because I have been doing loads of exciting thins. I have just not felt like writing because my mood has not been so great. I just feel like there is too much going on right now. And even though I have tried to take it easy because I'm paranoid that I will die if I do anything that is out of ordinary. Not maybe that literally but I'm seriously paranoid about getting cancer if I dont get the surgery done quickly enough. It sounds crazy to some, but it is my future with an 80% chance if they don't operate on me soon. So I'm allowed to be paranoid and I feel that writing this here is the only way for me to express my thoughts. I'm seeing a new doctor in a week so then I'll learn more. Can't wait! Even though I'm scared like hell.