Readers!

By the way, if you have not noticed I have opened the comment-section for everyone, so please don't hesitate to write something when you visit:) even if it is anonymous it's fun to read! :)

Perfect?

Why are we never satisfied? We as a race have a tendency to try and find something to complain about in everything. If we meet a new person whom we like a lot, why can't we just be grateful for that? Why is it that we have to find something in that person that is not perfect? Of course that person is not perfect. No one is. So why does a haircut or too small hands irritate us? Is it our way to try and get away from a situation that could make us happy and comfortable? Are we afraid that something greater could come from it? Or are we just trying to avoid a situation where we could possibly end up getting hurt? If I am at all right - witch I think I am, then will anyone ever be really happy if we all are going for perfection in everything though there is no such thing as being "perfect"?
This bring me also to my tattoo that says "Perfect". It does not mean that I think I'm perfect in the real meaning of the word. It is just a reminder for my self to keep strong and to know that despite of everything that I've been through in my life and all the bad things that have happened around me I still am perfect in my own way and nobody can or should take that away from me.

Think about it.

Blast from the past

Do you know that feeling when you start to think of something nice from your past and can't let it go from your mind? Well I know. Been thinking about someone from the past for a while now. Mainly for the way I felt during the time I had something to do with them. No one has ever treated me that way or made me feel so special in my entire life! Well something went wrong and maybe it's good that way because now I'm left with all the lovely memories and nothing negative comes to my mind when I think of them.
I appreciate the time I spend alone, I really do. Knowing that I had some growing up to do and finally achieving it has tought me my worth and that is probably why I have the urge to stay single. I'm enjoying my time with myself! But the only downside in it is that the longer you are alone, the harder it is to let someone new in your life. That's probably why we seek comfort in memories and our past..
But I wouldn't mind a Mark Darcy of my own. Been dating far too many Daniel Cleavers allready.

How are you?

I know I haven't been an active blogger. It's not that I don't have time or the feeling to want to write. On the contrary - each day I think about writing something but I know that what I really want to write about is how crap I've been feeling for many months. It's just that I'm so tired all the time and I feel sick because of my illness. Right now it feels like I want to give up and just let it destroy me from the inside. I don't have the energy nor the willpower to fight this anymore. Who the hell would like to eat ridicolous amounts of medicine per day and not see any signs of getting better? I'm done. My next doctors appointment is on the 20th and that's most likely the day I find out what they have in stored for me. All I know is I just don't want to be sick and feeling like this anymore but that I also don't have the energy to care.. It sucks to even say it out loud or that you can read this, but I wasn't planning on talking about it anyway with anyone, so might aswell write it.
There's been a lot of other stuff going through my mind lately that has bern occupying my head. Mostly stuff that has to do with other people. People who I want and need in my life and those who have slowly faded out from it without it really making a difference.
One thing I would love to be able to control - feelings. My stupid feelings. They make me do and say stuff that a normal person in a normal situation is not supposed to do or say. But I'm pretty sure it happens to all of you.
Oh well maybe it will pass.
But look at this, now I wrote about the sensitive subject and let you all in into my thoughts.

Time flies

Man kan lätt säga att jag inte skrivit på en stund. Har inte haft lust, ork och humör för att skriva. De ha hänt en massa saker och det är väl meningen att jag ska catcha upp er... suck å stön.

Min födelsedag kom och for. Hade fest hos mig som fick allas magmuskler att växa - eller uppenbara sig. Hade mina närmaste vänner här och efteråt hittade vi oss på Paronis klibbiga asiga golv. Yey.
På riktiga dagen hade jag familj och bekanta på besök och enligt tradition drack vi årets första glögg.
Firandet fortsatte på Baltic Princess på vägen till Estland. Mycket vågar jag inte berätta, men kan säga att jag försöker ännu också överleva..
Sen dess har jag gjort en helt del normala vardagssysslor. Umgåtts med flickorna, deras barn, börjat inreda mitt hem pånytt, varit på hotell"semester", fixat nya "ögon" åt mig själv, jobbat och bara allmänt tagit det lugnt.
Ett par härliga saker som är värt att nämna som har hänt sen senaste inlägget är det att jag blev gudmor till lilla Tatu och till födelsedagen fick jag en härlig present då jag blev frågad att bli faddermor till ett till undervärk som kommer till världen om några månader! Oj så jag är glad för mina vänner som får bebisar:) Även min brother from another mother och sister from another mister kommer att bli föräldrar snart!
Utan att glömma min soulmate-of a friend som blir pappa inom nån vecka!
Spännande tider vi kommer att leva om någon månad då det finns en liten vart man än vänder sig! <3

Här är lite bilder som kanske berättar mera än vad jag orka skriva

Efterfest på hotellet

Middag på kryssningen

Mina ögonstenar Tatu och Noomi <3